Nate mentioned in his last post a very interesting quality of time:
"...when we are busy time goes really fast in the moment, but in retrospect seems to have been forever. And when we have little to do in the moment time seems to drag but in retrospect went very fast. "
That's definitely been true for me. Working from home gives me a lot of time to do whatever I please, and usually, it doesn't amount to much activity. Prior to PCP, there was lots of reading involved. And walking, lots of walking. Walking to book stores and more reading. I've gone for a couple weeks without knowing what day it was. Maybe this is what the Zen masters were alluding to when they spoke of "no mind".
Probably not. But speaking of Zen, I came across a really interesting quote in a book I was reading today:
"To observe the regulations and keep to the rules is tying oneself without a rope. To act freely and unrestrainedly just as one wishes is to do what heretics and demons would do."
The quote goes on quite a bit, but those first two lines I find particularly relevant now in terms of how we've all been thinking about time and structure.
Our relationships with others are very intimately and almost exclusively related to our schedules. There are the people we socialize with when we have to be at work, and people we talk to when we're at school. There are friends that we see on the weekends, that we meet for dinner, and that we see only on birthdays. There are our parents, who we may see very little of. The person you live with you might see even less of. These social rules are incredibly powerful, and they define all of our relationships. There's seemingly very little room left for choice.
But these schedules, these routines, we have to keep them, how else would we live? At the same time, this is the invisible rope which binds us together, or keeps us separate from one another.
The second sentence of the quote is about separation. And I feel like it very much applies to a person like me. I have felt like a 'heretic' and an outcast many times in life (very strongly during high school). I was always very opposed to going with the flow. But going against the flow for too long may result in much suffering and eventually drowning. Without routine or schedule, our relationships become severed. When no one cares about you, its easy not to care about yourself.
So tell me, what is the right way?
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5 comments:
Of course, there is no "right" way, only what is "right" for you. And probably that involves some sort of balance.
I read somewhere recently that if you can allow some sponteneity within a "routine", you can lose that feeling of being tied. So having a commitment to do "something" with a family member or your partner once a week could be "tie" but you can loosen that feeling by being flexible about what that "something" is. Does that make any sense?
For me, time slowed down this week. By Wednesday evening, it felt like it should be Friday. PCP has had me getting up earlier and "doing" more so I guess I felt that by Wednesday I had done what I usually do in a week!
There could be nothing more monotonous and routine than a buddhist monastery, and yet people experience enlightenment experiences at them all the time. So it must not be routine itself that tethers us, but our mental states within the routine.
Take for example a Zen rock garden. The rules are quite strict and severe, more than any other type of garden, and yet it is finding the surprise and play within that framework that makes them so fascinating and alive. Much more alive than, say, an English garden that uses 14 varieties of flowers in various geometric patterns.
Any artistic effort, be it music, tea ceremony, painting, whatever, requires a set of rules that can be played off of, and, by the very skilled, broken.
I view our lives as a kind of artistic work. We have to play by a lot of rules but it's those very rules that make the game worth the candle
Tim,
You said:
'I read somewhere recently that if you can allow some sponteneity within a "routine", you can lose that feeling of being tied.'
I know what you mean by that. I read this anecdote in a Thich Nhat Hanh book about one of his students, a father. This man felt like he had very little time for himself at the end of the day, after taking time to take care for his son and his other duties. But he changed his mindset. He realized that the time he had to spend with his son and while doing chores and other work was actually his time too. After seeing things in this way, he realized he had "infinite time."
'Of course, there is no "right" way, only what is "right" for you.'
That's true. I don't believe there is a set way. But I did pose that question because the choice of the individual seems like an illusion. The cause and effect nature of things makes me wonder - who is choosing? Its not me who creates the routine....Or is it?
-A
Patrick,
"...it must not be routine itself that tethers us, but our mental states within the routine"
I thought that I was a person who went against the flow. I thought the flow was oppressive. But who created the flow? The oppression of it was my own mental creation. It's all in the mind. So when I go against it, it must be that I'm rebelling against myself. This must be what it means to be bound without a rope and to suffer like a demon.
'Any artistic effort, be it music, tea ceremony, painting, whatever, requires a set of rules that can be played off of, and, by the very skilled, broken. view our lives as a kind of artistic work. We have to play by a lot of rules but it's those very rules that make the game worth the candle'
I find that to be true. I guess that's why I like both Japanese ink painting and street art.
-A
Look at bonsai. I love bonsai but to create a masterpiece, especially one of multiple plantings, you have to follow many rules. Not to mention no one can create a new "style" of bonsai. all have been done in the past and all have their own sets of rules. No one in any recent time made the "windswept" style or the "raft" style however many have in recent time made masterpieces that were categorized in existing styles and followed the rules set. BUT each one of those was unique, are different ages, different plants, etc. So that's where you have it routine is only what you make it. Look at our new workouts. Sure you might be spending the same time every day working out but now you are doing different things. Just like you eat different food every day even though it may be the same weights. That's where I find mindfulness. Change within the rules.
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